The Canadian Writers' Collective

Writing, and writerly tangents

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Itchy Sweaters

By Antonios Maltezos

-Caught a glimpse of Margaret Atwood on TV last night, or was it the night before last, chatting up a storm with an older fellow who may or not have been Bill Moyers. I’m lazy when it comes to research, plus I don’t have time to look up the PBS website that might have a schedule I could look through, so we’ll assume it was Bill. Anyway, they were going on and on about God (it’s called theology when you use the big words). Because it was Margaret Atwood, I lingered a bit before clicking the remote. Actually, it was the expression on Bill’s face I wanted to check on. Did he seem uncomfortable at all? No. Click.

-The cats that have my neighbors by the balls. I called the SPCA, once, to ask if they knew of any tricks to keep the cats from my garbage bags. The woman on the phone suggested I go over to my neighbor’s house and inform them of how disgustingly unsanitary it was to allow your cat to roam the streets at night. There are maggots in them heftties, she said, especially in the summer. She said a lot more, but you get the point. I told her I didn’t want the neighbors to think I was an asshole, but that I was just fed up of having to double up on my garbage bags. Did she know of any product on the market? No. Thanks anyway.

-Writers who bitch about the misuse of they’re and their, lay and lie, like someone else’s typo makes any foinking difference in their lives.

-Lol and heh, the two most insincere words of this internet age. Hahaha just sounds insane, so I don’t mind that one.

-Deja-vu.(have I mentioned my neighbor’s cats before?)

-itchy sweaters.

-weak coffee.

-a trail of egg whites from the carton to the fry pan.

-sirens. Who’s having all these emergencies, and when is it going to be my turn? (Knock on wood.)

-thumbtacks.

-staplers that don’t work properly.

-The fact that I couldn’t bring myself to listen to a smarter person than I speak willingly about God with another person smarter than me, but I can easily waste time ruminating about stuff I hate.

Btw, it was Big Bill conducting that interview.

Also check out this great interview of Margaret’s. CBC archives

6 Comments:

Blogger Tricia Dower said...

I saw that interview between Margaret Atwood and Bill Moyers and liked it very much. She related belief in God to the novel The Story of Pi where at the end the protagonist asks insurance adjusters (I think) which version of his story they like better: the one with the tiger or the one without. They say with the tiger. Margaret said some people like the story of life with God better than the one without.

Thu Oct 12, 11:45:00 am GMT-4  
Blogger J.A. McDougall said...

Interesting take she has, Tricia, thanks for adding that as I haven't seen the interview. My own conclusion at the end of that book was that some people are without faith, unable to trust what they cannot prove while others have that ability.

Nice post Tony, may your coffe be stronger tomorrow morn :)

Thu Oct 12, 02:09:00 pm GMT-4  
Blogger Anne C. said...

I'm afraid to comment.

Thu Oct 12, 02:18:00 pm GMT-4  
Blogger Tricia Dower said...

Me again (having a conversation with myself, perhaps). Colin and I watched the Margaret/Hana interview. Squirmy! Hana deserved it, though. She started out confrontational. She could have said a few kindd words about the story collection before ripping apart Margaret's view of life. Thanks for the link, Tony.

Fri Oct 13, 03:49:00 pm GMT-4  
Blogger Patricia said...

Great post tony.....I have not seen the interview, sounds very interesting, I like your post, we have lots of animals that go through our garbage, just yesterday morning, I was greeted by a family of racoons who were quite happy going through....3 GARBAGE CANS!!! the contents of which were alllll over the cul de sac!!!!

tip:: someone told us, spray your cans with windex, apparently, it keeps animals away...who knows...it's worth a try....

Fri Oct 13, 04:35:00 pm GMT-4  
Blogger Antonios Maltezos said...

Tricia, I think the interview with Hanna Gartner is facinating. Thanks for the comments, guys ... even you, Anne.:)

Fri Oct 13, 06:01:00 pm GMT-4  

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